Things I Would Say

If I could…

I rarely if ever speak about my job. Mostly because I figured why repeat “A Dooce” and risk it all? Today though, I’ve been inspired by Shell at “Things I can’t say” because sometimes we all have days and moments when there is something you really WANT to say but cannot. Especially out loud.

So without further ado – quick background, I work for a large company (no names from this chick) and in my role I work primarily in the office management areas. Things like promotional products, invoices, back up to the primary mail and phone people, and then there is my primary role. Fleet – all things that role, float, are pulled, and the equipment we use to actually DO our type of work is overseen by me at the corporate level. In other words, repairs, registrations, insurance, billing, keeping track of who has what and who needs what and how the two shall meet …. All comes down to me. (Just think of your own vehicles and then add about 800 more to them.) I LOVE MY JOB. No really, even the DMV side of things – I find it challenging, ever-changing, and invigorating. (It helps having a great vendor company that does the more tedious side of most of those roles.) Sometimes though you want to look at people and go “Really?!”

There are some things that I just wish I could say. Things like:

• Employee – thank you for calling me about a fuel card issue. I would love to help you, truly, but telling me you drive a F150 when there are 600 of those in the company and the office you’re based out of has 25 does not help me. There is a VIN ….read it already. Then I assure you, I will get you what you need ASAP.
• Whiner – why thank you for calling me to tell me you are tired and frustrated that you have to work an extra hour today. Guess what, I am the sole person in my role at this time and our company works weekends. So guess who is ON CALL 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for whenever an emergency pops up. To each their own, but don’t assume because I’m in an office doesn’t mean I don’t do just as much work as you.
• Email sender – calling me 20 minutes after I sent the email does not incline me to rush rush rush. Yes I read your email, and yes I will definitely respond / do what you need. However, I have a long list of “to do’s” and just because you’ve now called doesn’t move you to the front of the list. (Sometimes it even moves you to the back.)
• The front desk caller (and this one I feel for our primary receptionist because man she’s got patience that I don’t…bless her!!!!!) – A few things, first and foremost when I say “Good day [company name], how may I help you?” It is NOT cute or funny to respond back by saying “why hello [company name]” as though its cute. I have a name and it is not my company’s name. Also, the phones ring pretty often so telling me your life’s story of how, what, when, and why without giving me the WHO you need to talk is really frustrating. Let me just save both of us the time and transfer you to the person you really need to talk to – just give me their name please!!
• To the people who walk by the front – there are multiple people who work up here, to be unable to recognize the difference between me and the primary person is insulting to both of us. We are not one and the same, we are not identical, and your inability to differentiate just tells us both that you don’t really see us. I am a person…not a machine. So respect me and I’ll be more willing to go out of my way to do you that odd favor you always seem to need. Oh and we are not babysitters. If the person you are looking for did not answer, please do not ring me asking if they are here, where they might be, when they’ll be back, and who is doing their job since you can’t find them. I don’t have a clue and voice mail’s are an AMAZING tool. Leave one – you’d be surprised how much better they work than the repeat calls.
• Lastly, to the person(s) who complain about helping by grabbing your own departments mail or heaven forbid relieving reception for a few minutes because you are too busy – guess what. We don’t have a full-time receptionist so every single person who works the front desk is pulling double duty. We are ALL busy with our normal job, and when I’m having to cover three positions a 5 minute break of your time is not that big a deal. It’s not like I’m napping during that break, I’m actually running to do another job and getting copies, scans, etc done for my own all so I can run up front again and not inconvenience you. So don’t do the theatrics of “I HATE having to be up here…” you aren’t getting any sympathy from me.

What is something you wish you could say to someone in person, but never would?